Google Updates Pagerank, Blogger Intelligence Remains Unchanged

Google Updates Pagerank, Blogger Intelligence Remains Unchanged

I’m going to freely admit something here. Not too long ago, I had no idea what Pagerank was at all. In fact, when I started this blog, I mixed up Pagerank with my Alexa ranking. Boy, did I think I was king shit for a day! After seeing that my site did not actually place higher on Google than Google itself, I asked myself an important question:

What does it really matter? If I can’t even come up first for my own damn domain name then why should I fight the fact that Google hates me? It’s not like I can hire a lawyer and sue them over it. I’ve only got $1.17 in my Paypal account. Google has at least ten bucks in theirs. It’s an uphill battle I can’t win.

I’m not even sure why I can’t rank for my own domain name. Have I wronged you, Google? I swear, it wasn’t my idea to install the Ask.com toolbar on my browser! Recently though, I tried to gather further information on what determines your search engine rankings. Wouldn’t you believe it? It was on Google’s site itself. Very sneaky, sir.

We use more than 200 signals, including our patented PageRank™ algorithm, to examine the entire link structure of the web and determine which pages are most important. We then conduct hypertext-matching analysis to determine which pages are relevant to the specific search being conducted. By combining overall importance and query-specific relevance, we’re able to put the most relevant and reliable results first.

Thanks, Google. I understand it perfectly now.

From what I gather, your technology is approximately seven times as powerful as eHarmony’s 29 dimensions of compatibility. A dating site that for some reason matches me up with middle-aged Latvian women who enjoy competitive bog snorkeling. I’m so glad the entire world has put our collective searches in your hands.

Seeing that no one will ever really know how Pagerank works, what should bloggers do? Well, I have the answer. We should do what we do best. Brag or bitch about it.

Not A Pro Blog is now ashamed to be PR2. For all the sites back linked here, I apologize for weighing you down. For all of those who would actually benefit from it, well… you’re not real bloggers. Google says so.

Laugh your ass off *and* educate yourself at the same time! Get the most hilarious free marketing tips for your business sent to your inbox. Stuff that's just too damn good to post on this blog, only available exclusively if you subscribe to my e-mail list now.

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  • I thought I was alone in finding the whole PR thing confusing. But I love "competitive bog snorkeling"--only slightly less murky, I think.
  • Pagerank is a vitally important way of measuring the website. And I'm not just saying that because I've secured a PR3 for myself. Oh no.
  • With the back links I have on your blog, now I know why mine comes up on page 124 on Google instead of 293. Thanks, dude!
  • Mark
    It's totally not intetional of Google not to give you any love. There are just ways that Google choose to rank the sites using their algorythm. Closely matching the need of the search engine will ultimately help. If anyoneI knew experienced this I would advise getting some advice from an expert as they know what should be done for a remedy. I hope it doesn't hold you back with your beautiful blog and that it remedies itself soon enough. Mark
  • ShaneRQR
    Genuinely funny and true in equal parts.

    I'm actually pretty sure that the page rank's sole purpose is to give webmasters something to brag/bitch about. It certainly doesn't do anything else noticably.
  • I've seen about a billion posts on page rank this week, this is easily one of my favorites.
  • Thanks, Mike... I wrote this post for pretty much the same reason - seeing everyone and their mother write about their new toolbar PR and either celebrating or bitching & moaning about it.

    Imagine if Google updated this more often, like every month? I'd probably have to hang myself to stop the echo chamber of the "yay! I'm a PR3 now!" voices in my head. :-)
  • I will never understand the working of PR. Perhaps there are other ways. :-)
  • I've said this so many times this week I'm going to be talking about PR in my sleep.

    Google PageRank is not the same thing, as your site’s ranking on the search engine results pages. There are still a number of bloggers that confuse keyword ranking with PageRank.

    I wanted to comment on that just in case you were confused.

    Pagerank has no impact on your Keyword ranking.


    Pagerank is factored in by incoming links.

    Why does Google rate us by number anyhow. I'm not a 3 I'm a 10. :-P

    Well that's what my hubby tells me. ;-)
  • thenetfool
    Haha, amusing post... and yeah PageRank is so tricky.

    For example: My current blog is TheNetFool.com, had been a PR of 4 (built up gradually since Jan 2008)... and is now PAGERANKLESS!!! *gasp* I am now building it back up, and only missed a few months without frequent posting.... but Google decided all my content was now completely worthless.

    Another website I run (now selling) is BullishBankers.com, which had also launched up to a PR 4. I didn't post or update a darn thing for 6 months... and lo and behold it is still a PR 4 today!

    How does this happen, or make any sense? haha :D
  • Yes I need my videos. Maybe just make a live webcam.
  • Hey Jordan,

    I started a thread on the Blog Engage forum (you know the one that we get revenue sharing for now) that links to a list 130 of the 200 things that make up Google's algorithm for rank. http://www.blogengage.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f...

    Now, I don't swear by this list or anything but my hat's off to the person that took the time to make the list. Her name is Ann Smarty by the way.

    I'm not a fan of Google and before I started blogging I was using Clusty for all of my searches so it really pisses me off that all of this SEO stuff revolves around their rules and their searches. It's like I said on someone else's blog, can't remember who's now, the only people really searching for any of this keyword stuff is us bloggers looking for new material. It really sucks.

    For example, think back to before you started blogging - did you really go on Google and type in "how to blog" or "how to make money online" or any of that crap??? I know I sure didn't (well I really don't count though because like I said I didn't use Google before).

    Well, no matter how much I complain I either have to go with the flow or get off the boat. (still sucks though).

    Please go to the forum and add to the conversation.

    Yours truly,
    @Ileane
  • Ileane, I'll check out the forum and weigh in if I can...

    It may be true that you & I never really went to search engines and typed the same phrases you see blogging/MMO gurus wanting to rank for... but obviously other people are. Check out some of the Adwords keyword tools and they'll tell you this.

    Also, we're probably unaware of our own search activity anyways in relation to other niches... I may not type in "make money online", but when I needed help getting my new webcam to work on UStream, guess some of the phrases I typed in to Google:

    "set up usb cam on ustream"
    "webcam doesn't work with ustream"
    "logitech ustream problems"

    I imagine the digital video people are saying the same thing we are: "I've never typed in these phrases, so who the hell is?" :-)
  • Hey buddy. sometimes your humor and your factual knowledge mix together in my head and I am not sure which end us up... so here is my timid $.02 (what, me... timid? :) ).
    But, to be sure, search engine rankings and pagerank are kinda not related.
    I have PR N/A sites that get traffic for longtail keywords, and I have PR4 sites that can't scratch the surface.
    you can do this little test if you like. Make a post with the headline "Mamamma Tuld Me, Ya Bitter Shoppr Arind"
    Write 400 or so words and use that phrase in the post 3 times and make it bold once, then bookmark the post on Delicious or Technorati.
    After that, wait about 15 minutes and go do a search for that exact phrase in quotes and see if your post comes up! I bet it will.
    Hmm, how did your little PR2 blog rank for that so fast? Because there are no competing pages on the internet for that phrase... nothing to do with your pagerank. But, your pagerank does help your content get indexed faster!!! that's why pagerank is important.
    So, to wrap up this very long, keyword-laden comment:
    1) pagerank (authority) means your posts get crawled and indexed faster
    2) search rankings are initially determined (mainly) by competing pages for the phrase

    of course, #2 there can get hairy when you have lots of competition for the keyword, and that is when inbound anchored links come into play...
    Al
  • Allyn, I'm kind of getting a kick out of the fact that you're having trouble figuring out if my posts are legit or just me putting on an act... :-)
  • Right now I'm sitting at "0" which I thought was pretty good.
    You can have it if you want though. I'm not really all that competitive.
    If you put my "0" behind your "2" you could be sitting at "20" and there wouldn't be a thing Google could do about it..
  • Imagine all the pressure I'd get to make comments dofollow then? A link from a PR20 site will probably cause every blogger dead and alive to come here and tell me "nice post!"
  • Thanks for the link love Jordan! I googled "not a pro blog" and there you were at the top....

    I look at it like this, my site was too new for a PR update this round, so I will bitch about everyone else being happy they got a boost. When I get a 3-4 on the next one, then I will brag ;-)
  • No problem, dude! I actually looked through my RSS reader and found 28 different posts within a week's time of blogger's bragging or bitching about their new PR. I figure give some love to some, right?

    By the way, yes, I know I come up at the top for that... but apparently our "friend" told me this wasn't true where he was located. I spent an hour or so moving my computer to different places in my house, just to see if I could recreate it.To no avail though... maybe I need to go on my roof?
  • Where's the video dude? I need video so I don't have to read, that's why I come here :(
  • I can't get all sexy and dressed up for you every day, Henri.
  • It's not like you get dressed for us anyway. IE Webcast, haha ;) That's like 2 posts in a row without video!

    As for your post here - I personally don't care too much about pagerank, not with beginner blogger anyway. But pagerank holds a value out there to others and I have some other blogs I would like to sell in future so a better understanding of the damn thing would be good.

    There may not be much on me but I need to eat too!

    Sarge | BeginnerBlogger.com
  • This is mildly disappointing.
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